It's Half Assed Because I Was High Schooled

Waiting for the Mookie to start. Flipping channels to see if anything worth watching. Yanks on ESPN again. What, third time this week already? Too bad the Yanks don’t play poker in the WSOP, ESPN would be covering it live wire to wire.

What’s going on with the blogs tonight? Comment I left on Waffles is no longer there. Waffles doesn’t seem the type to make one disappear. On to Josie’s and it says 3 comments but none are shown when I go to check. WTF is going on? I’ve entered the Mittelmarch.

On to the game. Seated at my table and recognize most of the names even if I haven’t had much converse with them. I see Julkeus, muhctim and Pushmonkey. Gary I’ve talked to. Trouble across the table in TwoBlackAces. See his name at too many final tables to take him lightly. MaggieO and DaBag make up the table. So far after 11 hands I’ve had a weak ace in 5 of them. Played it twice, in sb and otb. Won 1, lost 1, minimal pots. So far nothing major has taken place. Coop has joined the table. Take a decent pot when my ace gets stronger otb this time, A-K. Gary raised, coop and I call and flop comes A-Q-J. They both check, I bet 2/3 and take it. Been folding mostly but dump over 1000 to Gary. He raises, coop calls and I reraise with Q-Q. Gary calls and coop folds. Ace through the gate on the flop and I figure I’m cooked but Gary checks and I go 2/3s and he reraises and I fold. Get it back soon from coop however. I raise with A-Qs and he calls. Ace on the flop, he checks, I bet and he raises. I think a bit then call. Turn and he checks and I go all in. He calls, A-Q vs. A-8 and river bricks and I double. Soon take Julkeus out. I limp with K-Q off and he raises. I call and I hit a K in the door. I check and he shoves with about 900. I call and he has A-J and the Ks hold. Few small pots here and there as the tourney goes on. Mainly some steals. Have learned aggression pays.

Make it to the first break with about 6500. Gary is out. 23 Warsaw raises and Gary shoves his short stack. It’s only about 750 and I contemplate calling with 9-T suited but fold with regrets. Maggie calls and it goes to the flop and a check down to the river. Pair of 7s takes it but my T would have been good. Oh well. Lightning has joined the table as a shortie but soon doubles up. They must be putting all us nitty old men in one place. Where’s Mojo? Coop is out when his J-J loses to K-K. He hit his set but so did his adversary, Maggie. Too bad. Lightning has made a decent comeback from his short stack and guess who has taken coop’s seat. Shabazz Jenkins, wondered when he would show. Key Twilight Zone theme. Guess I’m going to have to link him this post just for FT’s persistence. Shabazz is gone, he shoves slightly over 900. I call with a weak ace and Lightning comes over the top. I fold and it’s Shabazz with A-Q vs. lightning K-K and the Ks hold. I soon take out microvillian when my T-T turns a set against his A-Q. Soon give it, and more, to muhctim. When I double him up with 5-5 against his 7-7. Thought he was C-betting a lo flop. Soon raise with T-T and get 2 callers but get no action when I flop a set and river a boat even though the turn is a K. Go into the second break with about 7500.mmThe rum is kicking in.

I get a few more chips after the break when my small pair gets no action but I get a double KO a few hands later. May have to continue this later. Game getting interesting and I’m buzzed. Do a double up when my A-K goes up against two all ins. BrainMc shoves his A-Q and Maggie comes along for the ride. Case ace hits but K kicker holds and I’m sitting decent. I do ok when my ducks flop a set against Warsaw. He min raise pre and I call from the BB. I hit the set and check as does he. Turn comes a Q and I check again and he bets. I minraise and he calls. River a blank and I shove my last 4900 and he folds. Couple hands later I chip up against AgSweep and my A-T hits top and bottom on the flop. Ag shoves bottom with gutter ball draw and my two hold up. My stack doesn’t last long as I shove Q-Q in to Dakota Black’s K-K. Board helps me not and my last chips go to OSU when he shoves top pair with a flush draw. I have 23 outs when I call with bigger draw, oesd and two overs but turn and river brick and I am gone in 16th place. Oh well, would love to cover final table but I’m shot for the night. GL all
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This is going to have to wait to be posted. Too tired to link and do the spell check. Didn't think one could get so screwed up on umbella drinks. Of course when you knock off the entire bottle maybe it makes a difference. Just found out that OSU won. Congrats, glad to see you put my chips to good use.

Thanks for the listen.

And a Wacky Wednesday it was

OK Josie, a few words about the Mookie. Now maybe you are doing the Dank/Buddy thing just to make nice to Waffles but think of this for a minute. You have started, and pushed, your own tourney, The Very Josie. All well and good. Enjoyed playing the last one. However allow your mind to wander into the future. You can do that can’t you; you seem to have a good imagination concerning other things. Anyway think of the time you either grow tired ad bored of the whole blogger and/or poker thing or, heaven forefend, you can no longer manage to handle such things. Someone decides that since you are leaving the game they are going to take over the running of your game as homage to you. Have no doubts, it will happen because there is always someone out there with more testosterone than brains. So now, your tourney is out there, with your name on it, being continued as a tradition by some peckerwood without any sense. Do you want someone pushing for the tourneys name to be changed to that peckerwood’s just because he is running it? (Buddy, this is not to imply you are a peckerwood, just a general swipe at some future, possible Josie admirer. Course if you take over running the Very Josie at some point in the future I reserve the right to alter my judgment) Back to the tirade. So Josie, do you want tradition to go hang and have someone pushing to name YOUR tourney after some futuristic Mojo type just because he hasn’t the brains god gave bastard geese in Ireland? Just think about it the next time you start to write Dank/Buddy in your blog in place of the Mookie. Is sucking up to Waffles worth all that? Just think, the Very Josie is pushed to become the Very Mojo Whatever?


Man it was Wacky Wed. at least as far as the Tokers game went. A tight table at lower levels started getting 4-5 limpers at about the 5th. Usually people tighten up as the blinds get higher unless they are shoving. I figured I was going to end this one early given the structure and the fact I had a few other games coming up. Little did I know even when I took a big hit just before break time. I figured the structure would make this one a quickie but when it started I found out it was a triple stack, or almost. Actually it was some weird number close to a triple in keeping with the Wacky Wed theme I guess. Even wackier was that when I took a peek at the lobby to see the players I noticed that third place is listed as top prize. WTF. I mention this in the chat box and someone else mentions that no, they see it as 4th so I look again and sure as hell 4th place is now on top and third is low man on the totem pole. I recognize a couple of the players from the GFN Forum Wars I’ve been playing and the Poker Analysis league games but on the whole it’s mostly a new bunch so have no idea what to expect here. Well I go along, grinding out a decent stack, lots of limping and checking by the table with a well timed bet able to take pots. They aren’t big but keeping me in business until I take a big hit just before the break and drop down below starting stack. After the break both the PA league game and the Very Josie start up and things really became wacky. Who needs a toke when it’s all a blur anyway? I have no idea how things went after break as all 3 games were being played at a decent speed and Josie was yapping away like a Pekinese and I’m on a fast track to who knows where. All I know is that in this game I’m playing a lot of pots and winning with a lot of air. Eventually I notice I’m second stack. Next thing you know we're down to the bubble and my stack is just average. No, I didn’t lose any; it’s just that while I’m grinding along here the rest of my opponents are doubling up and getting knockouts. My way was effective but theirs seemed a lot easier. I keep muddling along and we’re down to 6 and I’m second stack again and I think do I really want to do this? 4th place is the top prize after all but no one seems to be making an effort to dump chips so I keep on relying on good old air. It got me this far. Finally it becomes 4 handed and I even have a way figured to go out in 4th as long as I have the proper position but no one seems to be trying to hit that spot so I think maybe the payout figures are a joke and keep on playing. We play 4 handed for awhile so now I’m sure someone is just fucking around and I have become chip leader by a small amount. I take out the former chip leader and now have a massive chip lead on the other two. I also KO the short stack and I think the second place finisher just decided to give it up as a few hands later they shove with nothing and I actually had a hand. I won. Or did I? It seems that it was no joke, 4th place actually got the bigger money. Something I need to file away for the future. Even better is that as strange as this game was it was played against the background of both the Very Josie and eventually the Mookie. Head was definitely spinning.

While I did well in the game I figured to basically be a blow off game the rest of the night wasn’t so hot, at least on the poker side. Overall I cam out about even money wise give or take but of course I lost money on Tilt while adding more on Cake. I can’t do anything right. The PA league game and the VJ started up the same tie and I was already in the Toker game. The PA game didn’t last long so Josie I never actually got to those 4 games at once. I maxed at 3 last night. Don’t remember much about the PA game. Was heavily involved on both the Toker and VJ tables while Josie was still making like a yappy dog and I was getting taken to task by Gary for busting her chops. Oh boy, another tripper . Actually Gary ain’t a bad guy who was at the end of a loooong day and we got things on an even keel. No problems Gary, I’m used to those reactions from men where Josie is concerned. She has some kind of strange effect on them. Anyway, back to the league game. Went out early on a hand where the flop was T-5-5. Flopped TP2K and bet the flop and got a caller. Turn was low so bet again and again was called. Figured no 5 there since no raise so I shoved the river and guess I was called as next thing I know I was out. Don’t even know what beat me as I was tied up elsewhere. More than likely some peckerwood called me down with an ace and spiked it on the river. Oh yea, don’t even know the river card, I basically shoved without even paying attention.

Do have to say that the V-Josie was fun. (No that ain’t a nice comment about you) even if the cards stayed away. Took an early hand off Gary with a T-T. When the flop hit with 2 overs he bet and I said what the hell and threw out a raise. He thought about it then called. Turn was a blank and he checked and I bet and again he thought and again he called. Aw shit I’m thinking, I can’t get rid of him, he’s got a higher pair. River brought me a T but also put a possible straight and maybe flush out there. He checks and I’m debating, bet or check. Was he drawing and did he hit and now trapping? Check is probably the proper move as I’m probably beat if he calls or raises. He might however be holding top pair with a weak kicker so the right bet might net me a bit more. I bet, hoping he don’t shove over me. He thinks for awhile and then folds calling himself chicken. I’m just as glad he didn’t make that call. After that it was all down hill. I couldn’t catch a dose in a $2 house of ill repute let alone a decent hand. Coop still whining about having his aces cracked by Cricket’s jacks and Mojo talking about having them about 5 times. Hell, the only time I see aces any more is in the other guy’s hand when I have kings or queens. Anyhow with Josie in the game I couldn’t even try to make a play as everyone knows she’ll call you down with any A-rag. : It was still interesting and fun, the chat alone worth it even if Josie dominates it. Give it a try come the first Wed in June. You’ll like it, Mikey does. Somewhere in the chat dept I found I had a reader in Lucki Duck. Thanks Lucki, you represent a higher class of reader, I hope, judging by the lowlifes I usually find in my comments section . BTW, speaking of the chat Jordan plays a mean game in the trash talk department.

The Mookie was not memorable. The cold cards traveled over from the table at the Josie and it seemed every player at my table knew it. Every time I tried to manufacture a bit of luck I wound up getting check raised. Talk about bleeding chips; I was hemorrhaging like my carotid was cut. Somehow I scratched felt to the break but decided I wasn’t going anywhere so popped a sleeping pill figuring it and my demise in the game would t6ake effect about the same time. Actually the demise came a bit sooner when I made a stand with K-Js against an A-K. So I watched the end of the Very Josie and saw Jordan climb out of a big hole to take out Josie but come up short when Mojo hit Broadway to his flopped trips. Good game Jordan and nice win Mojo. There was one bright spot to the Mookie. Seems Josie has a thing going for Riggs and so was railing him at the final table and saw him go down with A-rag. She commented on it in her blog and when Riggs commented explaining his play Josie decided to give him a poker lesson on the play of A-rag. Priceless!!! Hell, I’ll pay a dollar to see the elephant pull a football out of a monkey’s ass any day.

And on that note it’s farewell for now. Thanks for the listen.

Wacky Wednesday

Been playing on ring games Power Poker lately even though I really don’t care for the site, at least tourney wise. This is because I have winnings sitting there and don’t feel like just letting them sit there so I’ll either play until I lose them or I have enough to cash out. Had about $200+ but dropped about half that on a day the poker gods were particularly pissed. Usually play the limit games there and do well but lately there have been no tables in my range so I’ve been playing the .10/.20 NL or the .05/.10 if nothing open in the higher table open. Only reason I decided to bring this up is because of two facts. One is that these are the tightest tables I have ever seen at these levels. They’re aggressive when they play but they don’t play much. Have never won so many hands on the flop but then it’s usually just me and one other player in, not the 4 or more common on other sites. So far I’m doing OK but it’s not a site to play unless I really feel like grinding. The second reason is there seems to be a lot of quick hitters among these players. A lot seem to disappear right after they hit the occasional big pot that does get played. Don’t expect to get your money back if you get sucked out on, at least not from that player. Have no idea why I mention this as I figure I don’t have much of a readership and I’ll lay a prop bet out there that of those who do 75% play either Stars or Tilt or maybe both but that’s about it. Yes they are the premier sites and I would probably be playing them too but for the fact of my membership in the Poker Analysis leagues. They range over a bunch of lesser sites, usually newer ones needing to build a base and so willing to pony up some bucks for freerolls or addeds to attract players. FT and PS really don’t need to do this so games there aren’t as common. Add in the fact I can’t build a roll at FT and you find me at the other sites more often. I also prefer AP for low level tourneys as they cut you more slack in blind levels. Used to play $5 SnGs , one on Tilt, one on AP at the same time and I would be hitting level 7 on Tilt while still on 4 on AP. I appreciate the fact they aren’t in such a hurry to clear the table.

Speaking of tourneys it looks like I’m going to screw myself royally tonight and go for 4. The Poker Tokers buy-in is on Cake is at 8. Wasn’t going to play it but they seem like a decent bunch so I figure I’ll donate some of my ill gotten gains on that site. It’s only a small buy in but the added will double the prize pool. Since it’s the mother site for the network of the same name, of which the above mentioned Power is a skin it’s a given that I’m not a fan of the tourney structure but one plays the hand one is dealt. Also their software is not conducive to multi tabling, the seating isn’t bad but the controls suck big time. You can’t set the slider for increments at all so you have to be careful on how you click. Last time I played the site I wanted a 3 times raise and wound up betting half my stack because I was in a hurry, 5 tables running that time, and wasn’t careful. They also don’t give you a whole lot of time to react compared to other sites. Given the structure however I should either be out or have it almost won by the time the Mookie starts.

At 9 I add 2 more tables, the PA freeroll league game, also on Cake and the Very Josie. Not really expecting to do well in the PA game, see above and it’s also a bigger donkfests than the Mookie. At one time the games were better than your standard freeroll. It used to be most of the entrants were at least trying to improve their game, in fact that is what it was started for but change of ownership at the site has loosened up the rules needed to qualify for the games and recently more freeroll chasers have come to set their butts in the seats. Fields have doubled in size; though not as big as they were when I first joined, but a lot of the new faces are just there to donk not improve. The Josie is going to be interesting though if I can concentrate enough on it.

Yes, I’m playing both the Josie and the Mookie and I’m even giving her a blog link. Don’t think I’m being nice either; it’s just that if I’m playing her tourney it’s only proper she get the respect for setting it up. Would link to the Mookie if he were still in action these days also. Just keeping the air clear about motives here. Still don’t know why people seem to have to decide between playing the Very Josie and the Mookie. Some folks make it sound like a big decision. I’m not talking about those on the West Coast where time is a factor but the other ones. The ones that make it sound like a big decision. Hello, can you say multi table? It ain’t like either one is that expensive either. Hell, the PTFR is more expensive than both together. Waffles is an exception since, as I understand it his budget is limited and some times he has to wait on it but that’s no excuse for anyone else.

The Poker Tokers game has started and I noticed the biggest prize is for third. Wait a minute it now it’s listed as 4th. WTF? Well what can you expect from a game called Wacky Wednesday sponsored by a site called Tokers. Gonna be interesting, BTW, while the levels still suck this tourney has a triple stack to it so might last a bit longer than I thought. Damn, A-K pre with a number of callers to the raise and an A-K on the board but don’t think it’s going to happen with 4 spades on the board also. My frikkin luck.

Finally at 10 it’s going to be the Mookie. Yes, the Mookie damn it, not some other name. BTW Josie, have a few words to share with you on this subject in a later post. By this time I’ll either be ready to concentrate on this game or will be busier than a one armed paper hanger with a case of the crabs. Obviously there ain’t gonna be any live blogging tonight and probably not a lot of hands relayed either in later posts. As I said it will be interesting. See you on the felt.

Thanks for the listen.

Another Mookie done done

Played the Mookie, and it is the Mookie, last night though wasn’t feeling the greatest. Even worse I had spent the previous couple of hours reading and when I do that my eyes go out of focus on the computer screen. That means I have to full screen the table to even see my chip count and tell the difference between a 6 and an 8. Given this there was absolutely no chance of any live blogging the game or even keeping a running tally of the table action to post later. Even worse there was no possible way to see, let alone participate in, the damned chat box so that the trash talk that makes this game so much fun wasn’t happening either.

I do remember a few things that happened. Was at ck’s table but she didn’t last long enough for a cup of coffee. Seems she got a bit aggressive against Blaargh and shoved a flopped mediocre top pair, 9s I think, into his pocket Ks. Early night for the Black Widow. Right after I told her she was getting to be as big a luck sack as Riggs too. Just had to go and make a liar out of me didn’t ya. I almost followed soon after and would have if I hadn’t won a small pot earlier. This time I was the one with the K-K and got trashed when Cracknaces gambled his tourney life on two over cards to the board and a flush draw when he raised my pot bet then called my shove on a 2 club, 10 high flop with K-J of clubs. As ck would say damned crubs. That left me sitting with about 250 chips while still at the first level. Somehow I was able to hang in and actually rebuild my stack up to around 2500 chips at one point but that point was somewhere after the first break so it wasn’t exactly a great stack by that point. Mainly a lot of shoves a couple that got calls here and there and hands holding up until my final shove with A-Qs came up dry against J-J. Would have been nice to make a deep run after being down that low early but it wasn’t meant to be. Used up that bit of luck when I pulled it off Monday night in a game amongst members of the Poker Analysis players when I went from an early mauling to tourney winner. Can’t expect that to happen too often.

Something I’ve been wondering about over the last couple of weeks is what gives with Josie? Don’t get me wrong Josie, it ain’t about you as such, you write a good blog, seem to be a decent person and don’t look half bad either if that is really you in that picture. However it seems every blogger with a dick is tripping over it in trying to make nice with you. C’mon guys, haven’t you ever dealt with a woman before? I mean Waffles I can understand, it’s entirely possible that he hasn’t if the rumor mill is correct but there can’t be that big a drought out there in blogger land.

Speaking of Waffles he seems to be desperate to get people on this change the name of the Mookie to the Dank bandwagon. Reading his blog I see he has Hoy listed as someone who is calling the Mookie by either The Dank or the Buddy in his effort to get others to do so. Hoy? Hoy? Now I don’t know what goes on between those two but from reading Waffles blog it sounds like Waffles would be the first guy to give Hoy a drink if he were in hell. Of Tabasco. Yet after reading nothing but trash talk from the aforementioned blogger he now cites him as an example. Oh the depths some people will sink to in pursuit of their agenda.

Damn, how did I live without all this fun when I took that hiatus? Donning my asbestos earmuffs. Thanks for the listen.

Break Time

OK, last night told me that it’s time to take a few days off from poker, online style at least. Even though the hot streak continues with the Sniper on AP, cashed another one last night for a small amount, I made some real boneheaded plays in it, the Skillz and the Mookie. Time to give my eyes a rest. Some of the plays were pure dee jackass, others, at first glance, might seem to come under the category of “that’s poker” but upon further review I decided that they were plays I could, and should, have gotten away from. Been playing online every night for almost two weeks now, which is a long run for me, and during the run the last week has consisted of some late nights, so combine that with the aforementioned donkery and it means that, after tonight, it’s time for a few days off. Would start to night but there is a regular game I play in, more for the enjoyment than the win, so I’ll go donk off in that one before I shut it down. Maybe I’ll catch up on some reading, maybe go see Watchmen this weekend.

Speaking of the Mook, I found it a frustrating game last night (another reason I’m taking a break. Frustration is not good). The table was a tight as a bull’s arse in fly season. Typical deal went, fold, fold, raise, everyone fold. It was mostly a preflop game, seemed like very few pots were actually played and when they were they wasn’t hotly contested. Seems like the only time someone called my raises were when I was playing position more than the cards. Every time I raised with suited connectors one of the blinds reraised, usually big enough that I had to dump them. Yet I had A-A 4 times and got action once and the same for K-K and that was from a short stack. That kind of thing does nothing to lower the frustration factor. I’m not making any indictments here either, hell I was as guilty of the same style of play and did more than my share of folding to the raises rather than mixing it up though I did defend a couple of blinds with less than premium hands but which I considered playable enough to see the flop. Got lucky with them too. No. just stating a fact, that it was a slow table and not much could be done about it. Of course the general distractedness I have felt the last couple of days also plays into my feelings on the situation. Anyway, we’ll take a couple of days off, recharge the batteries and be ready to bounce back into the BBT in a few days.

The Sniper was also frustrating even though I did cash it. It was frustrating for the opposite of the Mookie. Instead of a TAG table it was LP. I think I was the only one raising preflop unless someone had aces or kings but once they limped they had a strangle hold on that bet. If I had 5 limpers and raised pre I had at least 4 callers to the flop. I was getting creamed coming and going. If I had A-Q in a late position and raised and spiked my A I would get some guy in EP have A-K, who limp called to start, and check called it all the way down. OTOH, I had aces and kings cracked a couple of times by guys calling the preflop raise with hands like K-7 or J-8 and catching 2 pair. Now obviously it wasn’t all the time since I lasted a while but it seemed every time I chipped up I’d wind up bleeding off a quarter to a third of my stack in that sort of situation. The water torture at the poker table, slow death, chip by chip by chip. I felt I was going crazy trying to figure what I could do to get someone off a hand and make my hands hold up but when I guy is willing to call off a third of his stack to a preflop raise with K-7 off just because he already limped in; there ain’t much you can do. Of course, what the hell he’s doing limping in OOP with K-7 when he has less than 10 BB left any way is probably a better question. I realize people do these things, especially in lower limits online, and have lately come to take a Zen approach to it. Learn to keep myself calm, accept that it happens and just hope my hands hold up. Nothing else you can do about these players. Trying to throw punches at them in the form of increased aggressiveness is like trying to punch Jell-O, it’s just going to give and do its own thing anyway. You can only play your game and hope they slowly slip away. If it’s their night to catch cards, so be it, move on to the next game, the next night the whatever. One game does not a career make and $4-5 ain’t gonna bust me. I’ve gotten pretty good at taking this approach and think it’s improved my game some as it allows me to think more about it without the “I’m gonna kill that stupid bastard” attitude screwing up the rest of my game. So the fact that I found myself in exactly that attitude tells me it’s time for a couple days away from it.

Of course I will admit that last night was almost the perfect storm on the frustration front. Between the tightness of the Mook when I actually have caught A-A and K-K at least 8 times between them in one game, the general ‘tardness of the Sniper, the fact I could not win one race when I was behind and my tiredness all combined to try and drive my BP thru the roof. I relaxed and didn’t go off the deep end but still felt frustrated and let it affect me. Timeout. So I’ll play the Shark game tonight, have some fun and spend the next couple of days relaxing and catching up on some things, maybe even getting out to an RPT game to have a few drinks and play a live game. Haven’t done that for awhile except for their team heads up match last Sunday, which, while fun, ain’t exactly your typical game. I mean after all, if one doesn’t notice CK sitting by one’s side something is definitely wrong.

More boredom later. Drop in again